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How to eat like a normal man on weekdays and a beast on weekends

As a kid, they’ll take me to buffets and il eat til i literally puke (Ponderosa, i miss you). People who really know me know that i have a voracious appetite, even without the drugs. And so going on a diet of any sort will no doubt fail in my case because i aint gonna stick to it.

I’ve tried low carb and almost died (or wish i did). The moment i hit my target weight i celebrated with a trip to Kenny Rogers for a quarter chicken, macaroni and cheese and potato salad. So from then on i knew that for any diet to work, it must fulfil a few things

i) be uncomplicated and easy to follow
No counting calories, or choosing only low Glycemic Index foods, or organic or any of that shit. If i gotta think so much before every meal il gravitate towards low hanging fruit- i.e KFC.

ii) allow me to continue eating what i love
No rice? Are you insane Tim Ferriss?

If healthier living means giving up the stuff i love and never being able to eat it again, then i rather give up a bit of health for a little bit more happiness. No one with a 6 pack can be truly happy if he’s eating styrofoam all day. Let me have my beer and pizza.

(side note: in the past 6 months iv not eaten an orange or drank its juice, except one morning at McDonald’s, but this is coz of allergies. Everyone else should be allowed their OJ)

iii) Not result in social awkwardness
Say it’s Friday night, everybody wants to go for something really sinful, and you choose not to join them because ur on some diet plan that only allows you to eat steamed chicken breast. Well good for you because moving forward you’re gonna be eating all your Friday night dinners alone.

So what have i done instead?

Since 2 Feb and for the past 4 weeks, i’ve instituted some lifestyle changes as part of continuing efforts to improve my eating habits.

Rules of eating
From Mon to Fri (7pm)

1) 4 servings of fruits and/or veges a day
Nothing spectacular here, just the same guidelines recommended by the Health Promotion Board for the average citizen

2) lesser carbs does not mean no carbs
Just ask for half the rice at lunch

3) no snacking, fizzy drinks, sweet drinks, alcohol or sugar
Although sometimes in the afternoons i do eat handfuls of nuts lying around the office. I try to stick to the cashews but even these are glazed and salted.

4) no suppers (unless it’s Friday)

5) Record every meal, with photographs if possible
This was accomplished relatively easily with the Daily Tracker app (highly recommended)

What did i actually eat
What follows is a typical day’s meals

2 scoops of protein in milk, 1 fruit and 1 multivitamin

half the serving of rice, 2 vegetables, 1 meat, 1 serving of fruit

Usually whatever my Mom cooks (which is usually a lot, so i try to go easy on the starches)

2 scoops of protein in milk

But what about weekends?

Bestial binges
From Friday 7pm onwards, i go absolutely nuts. I’ll be stuffing my face with several buns and M&Ms at the same time simply because i can and coz they’re lying around in the office. Every damn craving i had i cram into the weekends. Sundays im at home watching TV and stuffing myself with candy and sweet drinks every 20-60 min.

This weekend binging is necessary to prevent yourself from going nuts on the weekdays. Knowing that you have a free pass to eat whatever the hell you want after Friday 7pm means you’re gonna get thru the tough week so much more easily.

In fact, on weekends, i force myself to binge even if i dont feel like it, and to the point of being grossed out by the very food i love so as to avoid it in the coming week.

I have yet to take ‘after’ body measurements yet, but i suspect based on the old trusty mirror (and perhaps self delusion) that i am in better shape.

And since every weekday lunch is pretty much rice, 2 veg and meat, i dont actually have to mull over what to eat for lunch anymore. This brings a modicum of simplicity to a life that can quickly get overcomplicated unnecessarily (self induced). I find it almost tranquil.

Sugar is a bad motherfu%^er
Proven without a doubt. Sugar will make me irritable, unable to concentrate, creates anxiety and depression, lethargy etc. During my Sunday sugar binges when im loading up on chocolate and sodas i actually find myself looking forward to Mondays so i can eat clean again.

Lesser cravings
All that fruit and fiber is actually keeping me satiated from meals, i no longer get 4pm cravings. Plus the protein shakes in the morning means im starting the day right (without the usual giant ass bowl of prawn noodles with lard that i have for breakfast). The protein shakes at night keep my prata and instant noodle cravings away.

Previously, 1 pack of maggi instant noodles with 2 eggs was the standard supper item. For the past month, i’ve only touched that instant noodle stuff once (in an entire month, to me, that breaks all records)

What’s next
So far, this meal plan has not killed me, it doesnt make me hate myself for sneaking in a potato chip or 2, or keep me awake at night with hunger pangs. So i think il stick to it.

Right now, iv got to head out to the gym for my last workout this month (my third workout in the entire month. Which il talk about in another post soon)


About lionelsnotes

I started ranting in Facebook notes, now il just rant here instead. Seems...neater


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